I know, I know…
The end of February does not mean that winter is over yet, but it means that we are so close to warmer weather and I can’t help but get excited! I truly don’t mind the winter, but February is just the worst. Here in Rochester, we seem to get the worst mix of cold, windy, snowy, wet days that just seem so gloomy! It’s the shortest month of the year, but it seems to drag on and on and on…..
But now March is here and I’m so glad! I am so looking forward to getting outside more with my kids. We were able to set aside some money to make some changes to our yard this year and I can’t wait until it is warm enough to get started. For those of you who have been to our house, you know that our yard is very tiny…but it’s a yard and we own it so Yay! We are going to put in a new walkway, a small patio, a fence, some new grass and a sandbox! I can’t wait to look out the kitchen window and see the girls playing out there this year….Spring, please hurry up!!
Today, we got Scarlet’s blood test results in the mail, and to be honest I was a little nervous to open it. I mentioned in my last post that we had to take her for blood work because the doctors are worried about her size. She eats a lot, but isn’t gaining much weight and her height measurements have been all funny (she literally measured shorter at one visit than she had at a previous visit, but that was probably just human error). While I didn’t think that I was THAT worried, I seemed to get more anxious as time went on. We have been praying that all of the results would come back completely normal and I really believed that they would. However, after a few days I started to wonder what if something was wrong. It’s a little nerve wracking when you are not sure if there is something wrong with your child. To be honest, we were not 100% sure what they were testing for, though we did know that they were worried that her thyroid wasn’t functioning properly. I like to think of myself as a woman who can trust in the Lord with anything, but I have a really hard time letting go of control when it comes to my children, even to the Lord. Though I knew deep down that the results were in His hands, my nerves got the best of me and the last couple of days I had started creating scenarios in my mind, wondering what we would do if this or that was wrong. Ahh!! Once you give in to those negative thoughts and fears, its just a downhill slope. When things begin to get out of our control, it seems to sometimes be easier to look inward and dwell on what we are worrying about, than it is to keep our eyes fixed on the Lord and His plan. Well, this morning I picked up my copy of Jesus Calling, which I have been reading sporadically. For some reason (perhaps due to lack of sleep) it took me until about noon to realize it was the 28th today, so early this morning I opened up to the reading for the 27th and this is what it said…
“Keep your eyes on me! Waves of adversity are washing over you, and you feel tempted to give up. As your circumstances consume more and more of your attention, you are losing sight of Me. Yet I am with you always, holding you by your right hand. I am fully aware of your situation, and I will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able to bear…”
Whoa! Did I need to hear that….Ok Lord, I get it, You are in control and I don’t need to be worrying about if and when the results come back or what they will say, I need to focus on You and on today…and I did. Today was a fantastic day, full of stories and games, laughter, cooking and cleaning. I LOVED today…
And then the mail came, and the letter came and we opened it and EVERYTHING IS FINE! All of the results came back COMPLETELY normal. We just have a small kid. In fact, all three of my girls are small when it comes to weight, and I am sure they won’t be complaining about it in 20 years…
I am so grateful to everyone who knew about the blood tests and who have been praying for us, I appreciate you all so much. But mostly, I am thankful for a God who loves my kids more than I do and who is proving to me over and over again that I can trust Him with them…..
23 Yet I am always with you;
you hold me by my right hand.
24 You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.
25 Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
26 My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever